As of
Sunday, I will have been a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day
Saints. It's hard to believe it has already been one whole year. One
whole year since my friend Elder Stradling left for Argentina. Almost one year
since Elder Scoggin left for Utah. One year since I had decided to change my
life for the better.
You may not be
behind my decision 100%, but at least support the fact that I have found
more joy in 1 year, than I have felt in 5 or more years.
Looking back since
graduation, I can truly see a difference in myself. Even from my Baptismal date
to now. So, before, I have only told pieces of my conversion story, but here,
for the first time, I will write it all out.
Back in October of
last year (2010) I was not in school and was Jobless. So, my friends, the
Stradlings, were getting ready to send one of the boys off. So, I spent the
whole week before his farewell with them, helping get the house ready. They get
up every morning at 6am to read scriptures, every one of them. So, as a guest
in their house, I felt I was no exception. So I got up with them and read too.
I felt a little weird at first, but felt right by the end of the week. One night,
I hid in the room I was staying in and one of the girls (my age, whose room I
was staying in) and we talked. I was feeling a bit lonely and left out because
I only really knew a handful of the family. So, in talking, she got up and
pulled a picture out. The picture was of a little girl and Jesus. In the
background was a city, but there was no one else. She was holing up a flower
for him and he had his arms opened wide for her. She reminded me of myself.
My friend told me she was at the store, spending some of her
birthday money, and she had grabbed this picture. She had told herself she
didn't need it and put it back. But before she left, she had purchased it,
unsure why. But now, she knew. She also read me scriptures and told me that
Jesus is my savior, my brother, and best friend.
Sunday, Elder
Stradling's talk really hit home for me and made me think, knowing him, how
hard it was for him to leave his family. Then I thought why is he doing this? Then it hit me. He knows the truthfulness of it and wishes to
share it. Afterwards, my mom and Stradling momma and the 3 youngest boys
(Including Elder Stradling) went off and took pictures. Elder Scoggin, my
friend, and I went back to the Stradling house and we talked about religion.
She had this book that had a few pictures of it and she began asking Elder
Scoggin what the thought was happening and going on in each picture. It was a
hoot. :)
On Wednesday of
that week, I received a phone call to set up a job interview for the first time
in 6 months. It was the first time and the very first thing that gave me a
testimony that when you read the scriptures, you are blessed. By the time I
headed home, I had the picture and a set of scriptures. My friend had given me
her first set of scriptures. On the front of the Book of Mormon, she wrote her
testimony and a little note for me. So, having the scriptures, I decided to
study them. Before she gave them to me, I told her I was still unsure about becoming
a member or taking lessons, that I would read the Book of Mormon and research
it a bit more. This is the funny part. The Monday we were home, my mom and I
went to subway and all of a sudden a flood of Elders and Sister Missionaries
came pouring through the door. (The subway was right near the Mission house).
So, I let them eat and I talked to them a little bit. Dumbfounded a few. Using
words like "testimony" and such. I told them a little about what was
going on and they said offered t send over our missionaries. I told them no
because I didn't feel I was ready yet. I had my 2 friends who were getting
ready for their missions to help me understand things here and there. So,
Tuesday night, we were walking home from having dinner and we ran into our missionaries.
I got their number just in case, but told them I wasn't ready for the lessons.
The next night we had just finished shopping, so we went to a Chinese buffet
and sure enough, there were two missionaries sitting at a table with this man
eating. I told Elder Stradling about this (before he left) and he said
"It's a sign." So, I called up my elders, or texted them, and we
set up an appointment for them to come give the first lesson. The middle of
November, they asked me to start going to church, so I did. I received a ride
from a couple who lived in my complex every Sunday.
The first Saturday
of December, there was a baptism in another area they invited me to go see. And
as much as it pains me to say, there is such
thing as Mormon standard time. He he. We got there for the tail end of the last
talk and the closing hymn. Afterwards, they reopened the font and I walked over
to look at it. I have to be honest; I thought it was going to be this amazingly
decorated, epic thing. So my first thought was 'oh, that's it?' But then
Suddenly, I felt this sweep of emotions fill me. There are no words that can
come close to explaining, but a few that are the tip of the ice burg are joy,
peace, calmness, warmth. Tears began threatening to burst through, but only sort of knowing 2
missionaries that were there, and seeing the cute guys, I made myself keep it
in.
I didn't tell the
Elders about this experience till the 9th. They looked at each other, then to
me, smiled then said "This is the sign you were praying for. You are ready
for baptism." (Apparently I was so excited that night, I couldn't sleep) I
was scheduled for a Baptismal Interview the 14th. I sat there, talking to the
Elder conducting it. We talked about a lot. He knew I was nervous, so, we
started off on small talk. But as we headed for the end of the interview he
asked me about my testimony of Jesus Christ. As I inhaled to answer,
I felt a pair of hands upon my shoulders and I knew for a fact, it was my grandfather.
He was
my grandfather on my dad's side. He passed away when my dad was 18
months old, so my dad didn't even know him. But somehow, I connected with my
grandfather. My dad's side of the family is about 90% members. It's a rough
estimate. So, during this whole thing, I had been talking to my great aunts who
live up in Utah. They sent me a journal and pictures of my grandfather. I know
he is proud of me and I can't wait to meet him one day.
Anyways, one of
the Elders was moved the Wednesday just before my baptism. Thus, I made the
other Elder give a talk. I told the Stradling family and a mutual friend, Elder
Scoggin, and they all happened to be getting out of school for break that week
(minus Elder Scoggin because he wasn't going to school). And It just so
happened, it was his birthday too! He was happy about the fact that we were
baptized exactly 11 years apart or something like that.
The whole time
leading up to my baptism, my friend who was my age from the Stradling family
kept asking me if I was nervous. Every time I replied no. I started to wonder
if I should be.
I ended up singing
at my own baptism (thanks to my friend). On a side note, I learned the song that day. So, we get to the
part where I get into the font.. This just shows you the story of my life. I go
to get into the font and the door was still locked to get into the font. I guess
people were starting to worry while I stood there, unsure of what to do. We got
it unlocked and I was really worried the water was going to be
cold. Pleasant surprise, it was warm. (I guess that's the good thing about
having a place to get baptized that has in-door plumbing).
*Time to go get my journal to depict what I was feeling correctly* ~I realize now, going back and reading, i missed some stuff. Glad I wrote everything down!~
I remember coming out of the water, giving Papa Stradling a big hug and went to change. I stood there, just inside of the door and just as my mom walked in, I burst into tears. I was so overwhelmed with joy. I wrote in my journal that night, "It's so amazing how I feel. So clean, so pure, so happy and so loved. I Physically feel clean and tingly. I am so happy and blessed." You know that feeling just after you get out of the shower, how you feel clean. Multiply that by 100 and you will get close to how that felt.
(Elder Ingram, Me, Elder Hefner)
I Have truly seen this gospel change my life. Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if I hadn't spent the week with the Stradlings. What if I hadn't taken the lessons? What if I didn't get baptized? Then I cross it all out of my mind because What does it matter? I am happy now and I made the right choice.
I truly am blessed with such wonderful family and friends. I love you all. Heavenly Father and Jesus love you too.
I'm not going to leave you with a question or a pondering because this took me forever to write.
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